Hey Ladies! So for those of you who are familiar with me, you know I basically only dress when I travel for work. I only travel maybe one week out of every couple months. I normally travel with a couple coworkers, and even though we all have our own rooms, I still can’t risk being seen in the hall as Krista.
This trip was a very last minute, and I was the only one needed, so I wanted to take advantage of the rare opportunity to finally escape my hotel room and grab a drink at a bar.

I’m in Greensboro, NC, so I looked up lgbt bars, and one of the two places to choose from was closed, so I guess that made my decision for me. Chemistry Nightclub.

I waited to leave for the club until around 11:30pm. I kept hearing doors closing and feet shuffling in the hall, so I waited until it was quiet. I opened the door and checked my key card on the door before letting it close, just in case lol. It worked. The door latched behind me and I was on my way. I made my way down the hallway to the stairs. Walked down to the main floor, peeked my head out the side door, the coast was clear. It was drizzling out, just a little mist, but as I walked to my car, hearing the sound of my heels tapping on the concrete, the cool breeze blowing through my hair, it was so refreshing. I had a nice relaxing cruise once I got out on the highway. I didn’t want to do anything that could get me pulled over. I wasn’t up for that much excitement.

It was about a 30 minute drive. When I arrived, there were a couple guys standing in the parking lot, talking to someone in a car. I parked the car, and was making sure I had my card and ID. In all of my nervousness, I dropped my room key down between the seat and center console 😫. So as if I wasn’t already freaking out, I had to go through the back side door, digging under my seat to find my key. Found it!

I gathered myself and headed towards the door. I could hear music bumping from within, it seemed more lively than I was expecting for a Tuesday night at midnight.

As I walked in, I was blown away with how fun it felt. Probably a dozen people who all seemed to know each other, singing karaoke and having fun conversations.

“Hi sweetheart! What can I get you?” a cute girl from behind the counter says to me. “Blue Moon, please”.

I take my drink and sit at a table along one of the walls. I’m just enjoying myself, watching kareoke, when a guy leaves the bar and comes over to me “there’s no reason to sit alone, you’re welcome to come join us! We’re all regulars here”.

I walk over with him to the bar and hopped up on the stool they pulled out for me.

I was doing it. Krista was doing it.

They all introduced themselves, and were asking questions about where I’m from, what I do for a living, etc. They seemed genuinely interested in getting to know me! The guy that invited me over was very interesting! He retired from the music industry in 2008, and owns a bunch of businesses now. I asked what he did in the music biz, and this man toured the world with countless bands as a guitar tech! He was My Chemical Romance’s Lead Guitar Tech on their Helena tour. Also toured with Good Charlotte. Super interesting.

Anyways, before I knew it, it was 1am, and I had to drive home (30 min) and undo all my Krista, and be up for work at 4am.
I said my goodbyes, a couple people even asked for hugs!

I drove back to the hotel buzzed like I’ve never been before. Not from the alcohol, but from the incredible experience I just had.

I pulled into my spot on the side of the hotel and parked. I got out and headed for the door. I pulled out my key and held it to the reader………. nothing……. that’s strange. I try again……… nothing. WTF, AM I LOCKED OUT? I had no other choice but to walk through the main entrance of the hotel, past the receptionist. I walk around the building to the front, take a deep breath, and walk through the sliding doors. Nobody is at the desk (sigh of relief) I make my way to the elevator, push the button, and notice that it’s at the 3rd floor. Someone might be in this elevator….. my heart starts racing.. “DING” (door opens) empty. (sigh of releif)

I make my way to my room. God, I hope this key works. I put my key up to the door……. “click” the door opens 😌

I did it. Krista did it.

I wish I could go back and tell my 15 year old self that, one day, you’ll go out in public completely transformed, and you’re going to have a great time. Also, hang in there.

I had a tough teenage/early 20s because I was ashamed of who I was, but I couldn’t stop, no matter how many times I’d purge and tell myself “that was the last time”. It wasn’t until my late 20s that I came to the acceptance that this is a part of me, and why should I stop if it makes me happy? That mindset helped my wife become more comfortable with this side of me. Once I gained confidence in Krista, it became a lot easier to talk about it with my wife. She still isn’t crazy about it, but she knows it means a lot to me, so she is alright with it, as long as it doesn’t interfere with my day-to-day responsibilities.

Anyways, I hope you’re all well, and thanks for taking the time to read my story! ♥️