Today was the most productive day, outside wise, than i have had in years. I have been dealing with phases of agoraphobia and selective mutism for years now which get better or worse dependent on other severe mental illnesses such as schizophrenia and Bipolar disorder 1.

I invested in noise canceling headphones, brought my service dog, and used my voice for the first time in public for over a year. Usually I use American Sign Language. I was able to tackle Costco (my worst enemy), 2 drop offs for friends, a court hearing with my representative, getting my oil changed, putting gas in my car, and picking up my medication from the pharmacy. I spent more time outside today than I have in literal years. I interacted with more people today than I have in years - strangers specifically. I didn't have a caregiver with me. I didn't have anyone except for my service dog. And I made it. I DID IT. I barely leave my house on a regular basis and today, I conquered so much that "normal" adults do! I'm feeling so overwhelmed and overstimulated and anxious, but I also feel so.. proud and productive and powerful.. if that makes sense.

Like, I did it.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring. I never know how I will wake up. I never know how my days will be. But, today? Today, I fucking did it, friends.

Please give me congrats like I'm 5. I don't have many people to share this with.