A brave and glorious struggle by our workers has persisted since yesterday as a coup by traitorous cowards attempted to overthrow our glorious leader. What started as a basic trial for one individual turned into a confusing fight in which a number of ministers attempted to overthrow our Glorious Leader. During the ensuing chaos, our Glorious Leader held a rally with supporters in which he yelled with a defying voice, "We will purge this glorious city of these Terrorists, inch by inch, house by house, apartment by apartment, alleyway by alleyway". By the time our Glorious Leader could muster the workers, the Terrorists already took over 85% of the city and with a need to restore security, our Glorious Leader wisely considered the effort of the reformed members of the HCF.

In a brief conference with HCF members, they agreed to support the workers of Buenos Aires against the threat of terrorists as they have done for Mount Augusta. In a series of rapid deployments, the HCF joined in the fighting and began the glorious effort of liberating Buenos Aires from the threat of terrorism as one to two members were pearled while two to three others fled for their lives into the savage wilderness. Our Glorious Leader thanked the comrades of the HCF in which he proclaimed, "I, along with the people, thank the HCF for their valiant effort against this threat. If there wasn't any intervention, the conflict would have taken more lives in the process so I consider the HCF's intervention as a humanitarian mission to save the city from itself".

HCF members next to the statue

Know your terrorist! After several hours in a dark room, a number of terrorists have notified that they were in fact either foreigners from an Islamist cell or bribed officials who were being offered hundreds of diamonds by Ancap terrorists. In a revealing statement by a heavily bruised terrorist, he remarks "Yes....I was planning this for several years now.....and...and I was paid by a number of Ancaps....including..umm..what was his name against? Exultant? Yes..Ex...ultant in exchange for hundreds of diamonds". Other downtrodden half starved deviants are also being thrown into a new game involving a savaged wilderness, a central supply of weapons, one winner, and the highest entertainment ratings just after "Alo Glorious Leader". They still haven't come up with a name for the game yet but they sure are hungry and the prize of a lifetime supply of sawdust bread along with a new cell with a bed always brings out the wor...I mean best in comrades.

If you're stuck in the middle of a coup, use the paper format of the People's News Today as a weapon by simply rolling it up in order to make a deadly paper club that may hurt an unsuspecting terrorists for maybe a few minutes. Remember, if you want to start a coup, head over to your local secret police to discuss what you plan to do, or else.