As the United Fruit Company has indicated its refusal to promptly comply with the lawful decree of the Holy Trade Commission of Ek Chuaj, the Commission has henceforth authorized any and all interested parties to apprehend the shareholders, officers, and directors of the United Fruit Company and bring them before the Commission for sacrificial execution. This authorization shall remain valid until which time the United Fruit Company has complied with the Commission's decree in its entirety. Interested parties are eligible for a substantial monetary payment upon the successful delivery of a wanted person, and are invited to contact a representative of the Commission to discuss the details.