It has come to the attention of the priesthood of Ek Chuaj, god of merchants, that the so-called "United Fruit Company" has been engaged in squatting, trespassing, theft, grand larceny, criminal conversion, possession of stolen goods, fraud, false pretenses, attempted monopolization, and other crimes and unfair trade practices. The Holy Trade Commission of Ek Chuaj has decreed that all commercial and industrial activities of the United Fruit Company are to be suspended until they cease their unlawful practices, provide full compensatory and punitive damages to the parties aggrieved by their unlawful practices, and swear to never again commit similar unlawful acts in the future.