i used to be a hypochondriac before i got my first chronic illness. i would go to the clinic for any little thing and be sooo worried it was a huge problem (it never was).

since my first diagnoses 5 years ago, i have since collected 6 in total! and now, i dont just avoid regular checkups, but checkups for stuff thats new. simply because i just dont want to enter a clinic/hospital. currently im sort of due for a second surgery (though not urgent). but i dont know when ill ever do that.

i just want to move somewhere far away and live out the rest of whatever is my life there, and succumb to my illnesses whenever, and not go to a hospital

please note: i am not looking for advice and am not fond of "you should still just really go for a checkup" comments/messeges. this is solely to sulk about hating hospitals and clinics >.<