I have always been christian, in all 15 years of my existence i have had no problem believing and embracing all that that entails. This past summer, my dad killed himself. Nobody saw it coming, not even his therapist. He was my dad, my best friend and my rock. I have lost all sense of direction, emotion, and religion. I do not understand why any god would allow for such terrible things to happen to anybody ever. I have learned how terrible of a world we live in. I do not understand how I can worship a god that took my father away from me. I still attend church, only for socialization though, and i find everything about the services to be bullshit when i previously did not. I want to understand why things like this happen, and what Christianity’s excuse is, for lack of a better phrase.