People have lots of fantasies... somehow some have concluded that this is bad. But fantasies are just desires and wishes. I have often fantasied about traveling the world and see the wonders of the world. I have fantasied of traveling the world and seeking sexual experiences. Of course the fantasies I have had about Brad Pitt... ummm-ummm. Lately I have fantasied about putting a whoopee cushion under Putin's ass as he sat down for a press conference.

Some people have dark fantasies. Others enact fantasies that are truly evil. These dark fantasies are seldom healthy. We hide some fantasies, especially sexual ones from spouses and fellow playmates, anything hidden is not healthy. We may hide those sexual fantasies from our spouses for fear of how they will react. We hide our sexual fantasies from others for fear of persecution.

What I am here to say in this post is that your sexual fantasies, whatever they may be, can be healthy. Fulfilling them can be great fun and joy. Some will let you down. Many fantasies that I had and fulfilled were of sexual experiences that I wants to try. CHECK-BOX! Some were amazingly erotic for me. A few, like doing a naked snow angel during the first snowfall of December, became fun traditions note: but only the first snowfall -- I have fun with it and I take pictures of my butt print in the snow and love calling my husband to witness the event, otherwise too cold for words.

I struggled with what was a healthy fantasy and what was not. Not for myself as much as for others who were in the lifestyle and struggling with this. I had a fantasy of enjoying two men... was terrified about telling my husband. As our communications in the lifestyle improved, I blurted it out and he was fine with it. CHECK-BOX! He wanted to have a FFM experience, I arranged it... CHECK-BOX! I wanted to have sex high in the Rocky Mountains outdoors on a trial overlooking a valley, backpack a blanket... CHECK-BOX. But not a CHECK-BOX for him, he was pretty winded at 10,000 feet plus I was on top... better view!

So I haven't really told you much, but through my journey I have come to a decision. Fantasies, almost all of them are wonderful and personal. The healthy ones are consistent with our core beliefs. They do no harm to ourselves or our spouses, they do not harm others, they do not take advantage of others, they do not hinder us from preserving our marriages and relationships, and while some may be strange (I knew someone once who found toothpaste erotic (*mint flavored only), they are something you should learn to express, to share, to not hide in the shadows.

So I have few fantasies left without CHECK-BOX! But one I have regularly is sharing love, erotic feelings, sexual joys, with my fellow Christians. I can live out that fantasy every day of the week and twice on Sundays.

CHECK-BOX!