This happens a lot to a lot of women. It's a common discussion topic at some of the Girls Uncorked gatherings I attend around the country. My opinion is that this is harder for women than men who seem to be more able to compartmentalize that this is about recreational sex.

Now have I had feelings. Yes, but I have always been able to put it into perspective. And I have had this experience with both men and women. But how I compartmentalize it is that I married my husband for a reason. My feelings for him will never be second place in my heart. I have found that I can have feelings and love others, but it isn't something that I have ever felt the need to screw up the positive things in my life.

I have a close couple who left the lifestyle and may come back because she felt that she was falling in love with someone else. And I know her so well that I can safely say that this most likely was biological and not spiritual.

We wired to want to be with someone we have sex with. The chemicals rushing to our brains drive that desire. So when you encounter it, accept it, open that box, and consider why you are feeling the way to are feeling and remember that first day you can remember feeling the same way about your husband or wife.