So this will be controversial for some I am sure. Simply because I added one word, "Christian" to the post title. More so for those who feel that Recreational Sex with partners other than your spouse is a sinful act.

This isn't a "how to guide" or an attempt to defend the ideas of Christian's swinging. This is just a simple introduction of what it's like to "swing". The concept of being Christian is there because Christian's have a standard of behavior based on Christ's Great Commandment, that we treat others as we would want to be treated. Some say to love one and other. Do onto others as you would want others to do unto you.

In life, I have witnessed the good, the bad and the evil in life and this applies to the lifestyle as well. You can likely recall a human encounter you have had where the person was good, gracious and considerate. An bad encounter with someone rude, disrespectful, self-center, and self aggrandizing. Hopefully you have not encountered an evil exchange, which is always out there, hidden in the shadows.

I will go into detail in the future about what the difference is between a Christian Swinger and a Non-Christian Swinger. Often there is no difference as there are a lot of people in the world who are good people and not Christian. I meet lots of couples who are non-Christian and are lovely people. I can safely state that I have played with couples from each of the major religions. But I have also encountered people who were bad and on a rare occasion, someone who was outright evil.

Christian Swingers, it's not about your being a Christian, its about applying your core Christian beliefs to your Recreational Sex Activities. How do you treat your spouse? Are you open, honest, loving, complimentary, do you build them up when they are down? You can attend Church every Sabbath or Sunday and if you mistreat your spouse, then you may not fall into the evil category, but you certainly can fall into the bad category.

But enough of this... let's get on with the topic at hand.

So what are swinger encounters like? I have had encounters where we simply added another solo lady or gentleman to our play. I have had encounters with just one other couple. I have been to house parties where the host will invite their friends who are swingers. I have been to many many lifestyle clubs. I have been on swingers cruises, gone to swingers resorts (like Hedonism), swinger hotel takeovers, swingers RV trips. And of course, I have been in a flat out Roman Style orgy. You might find it odd when I tell you my favorite orgy was just a group of Christian Swingers on a mountain camping trip.

For 99% of couples out there, I always suggest that your first encounter be at a Swingers' Club. Not a house party, not a new couple encounter, but rather at a party where there are lots of other couples to interact with. A place with rules, structure, and a good reputation.

The reason is that it is easy to set expectations with a club. You can easily vet most clubs and decide if it is right for you. I typically suggest the "couples only" clubs to get started. Make sure you understand the club rules. Do they require nudity, do they have a "play" expectation, can you simply be a fly on the wall and just watch? Is the club newbie friendly? Do they provide an orientation and tour? What is the alcohol policy? Is there parking? Dress code? Is there a theme the night that you want to attend and is it mandatory or optional. What does it cost to attend (all costs as some clubs charge for sodas and juices, parking, towels, and a host of nickel and dime things.)?

For me, the event starts when I start to get ready. What do I want to wear? Do I feel confident in the clothes I selected. If you do not feel confident in revealing clothes, then wear what you feel comfortable in. But I always suggest that you dress to impress. I often suggest that couples dress each other. Often my husband picks out what he wants me to wear and I pick out what I want him to wear. At the large clubs, you will have couples that are dress "street appropriate", wearing something they could wear walking the Las Vegas strip. Other couples could be wearing club-wear, cocktail attire, or very reveling clothes. Some will be in lingerie and boxers, and other may be nude or wearing a robe. You will see everything.

Always get the tour and ask for an orientation. My husband and I are very experienced, yet when we get to a new club we have not been to before, we always arrive right at opening time. We socialize with the volunteer staff, we get a tour, ask questions and make sure we understand the protocol for the club. We have a starting cocktail and let the evening unfold.

So what would you envision a club would be like when you walk in the door? Rows of mattresses starting at the door? This is usually not the case.

There will be social areas to talk and meet others, some clubs had a dining area, most clubs have a dance floor and a bar area. My favorite place to meet other couples is on the dance floor. You will find that its common for the women to start dancing together and the men to join.

Most couples will want to chat for a while, get to know you and perhaps other couples attending that night. Some couples have already met someone online (a common occurrence) and have "play plans" already made. Some couples have a few "regular playmates" that they like to go off to a playroom with. Usually for the first couple of hours of the evening, there is very little sex occurring. But usually by midnight, things are kicking into gear.

Most clubs have a voyeur area where you can sit and watch other's play. This is always fun and sexy and a great way to observe the lifestyle protocols working, such as "ask before you touch", "ask before you join in", "ask if there are any boundaries". So "ASK" is an important thing to understand. "NO MEANS NO" - you need to remember that, if something is happening and you don't feel comfortable, simply say "No". It's a golden rule at lifestyle clubs.

At clubs, you will see someone having sex. You will see others who decide for many reasons that they are not going to have sex (perhaps they are new like you). Some couples are soft swap which means they will have sex next to you, but will not swap partners for intercourse. Some are acrobatic having sex. Others its the good old missionary position. You will likely see a little bit of a lot of sexual activities. Remember ------ It's best to just watch the first time.

It's important that you and your spouse have discussed what your boundaries are. I strongly suggest that the first time you attend a "sex club / party" that you do NOT play! Put a toe in the water. Perhaps go into a room by yourselves and play with just each other. If you are a bit adventurous, do it in a group room, but just tell those around you, that you would rather not be touched and you were not interested in having someone join you. Be polite but be firm. Almost every party I have attended, the majority were good people, there are always a few bad people, and fortunately rarely someone that drops into the evil category.

The next day after the alcohol buzz is gone and you have both digested what you saw, discuss what you did, how you felt, make sure to take the time to discuss it. How did you feel? What did you think of what you saw? Did you enjoy the club? Did you met anyone interesting and how did you feel about them? Was this a one-time experience or do you want to put the other toe in the water?

For those who have experience, tell us about your first time. For those who have yet to experience this, what are your thoughts and what are your questions!

LV-Vixen