My POS brother dropped a bomb on us on Christmas that he was finally marrying his long-time girlfriend. Since he lost all of his inheritance (mostly stocks we all received when we turned 18) on cryptocurrency, he is broke, so he is having everyone in the family cover certain expenses. Since I worked for years in fancy restaurants, including as a sous for a James Beard award-winning chef, I get to cover the meal. After pressure from my parents, I relented. This morning he called to tell me what he wanted.

• Attendees = 250 invites, all with a plus one allowed
• Cocktail hour, with tray passed hors d'oeuvres, he's still working on what that will entail
• main course (plated, not buffet style)
  • beef dish - Filet mignon, served with Yorkshire pudding and roasted asparagus
  • poultry dish - Red current glazed duck breast, with fondant potatoes and grilled brussels sprouts
  • veg dish - Chickpea bolognese, with cauliflower pasta and mushroom gratin
• dessert - a collection of choux pastries, other pastries, and mini cheesecakes

To make matters worse, the kitchen rental at the venue is $1,000, which includes the cleaning fee, but not any cookware or utensils. I'll have to pay for additional cooks, servers, bartenders, bussing staff, and the serving ware.

I am beyond livid.

More frustrating is my parents have always babied him, and so when I called to let them know that I wasn't going to do it, not if he's going to be demanding all this when getting it for free, I was told that I should call up my restaurant contacts and see if they would be willing to donate their time or the ingredients.

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UPDATE: My parents had a heart-to-heart with him, after discovering that he's been taking money from other relatives as well for a few years. They gave him an option of not taking any money for the wedding, and they would pay for courses so he would learn how to be more responsible with his money, or they put an undisclosed amount of money in an account and hire a wedding planner who can use the money from that account, but they would cut off all contact with him.

There was apparently a lot of crying on both sides, but ultimately he decided to take the cash. We were told to no longer help him out financially, and (they recommended) not contacting him either.

Is there a word for feeling happy, sad, relieved, and disappointed, all at the same time?

FINAL UPDATE: It's been a wild few weeks.

I learned that the trust my brother received was revoked by my parents a long time ago. In its place, they gave him a small allowance so that he could still afford to live, which they also stopped. The reason? As many pointed out, it turns out my brother has serious addiction problems, and when he said he was going to the "Malibu Four Seasons" or headed out to the "Courtney Love Dance Festival" he was actually checking into rehab.

He called me last week to make amends, because he's going back into rehab, and it's a requirement that you put to rest any hard feelings before checking in. We did nothing but argue. First, he insisted that the food costs wouldn't be in the tens of thousands, because he knows that it only costs a dollar or two per plate and that all that extra cost is nothing but markup (something he wouldn't let go of). Second, he couldn't understand why I would think there is 500 people coming when he clearly stated that they invited 250 people each with a plus one since any "reasonable person" would know that meant there were only 125 invitees who have the option of a plus one. Lastly, he absolutely despises my parents and everything they represent. The only reason he took the money was that he wanted to hurt them. (btw, the only reason they offered to give him money at all for the wedding was that they are very Catholic, and wanted him to at least have a proper Catholic service)

It's been very eye-opening to know that there are a lot of hidden skeletons in the family, that have been kept from us so that we appear "normal."