First, I don't even feel like I have a right to post this. The "others have it worse" mentality has really taken over. I need grief therapy I know that but I'm almost scared to at this point. Also I'm on my phone so formatting will be awful.

My dad died February 4th last year. It feels like we're speeding down the track to the anniversary of a year without him. Once we hit 11 months I started dreaming about him.
Dreaming that he's alive and had been in hiding, or witness protection, or anything along those lines. Everyone else just forgets he died and the pain and he'll he put us through. Even my level headed sister. But I'm devastated that he would do such a thing. In my dreams everyone tells me go get over myself and to forgive him and he's family. "I'll regret it later" bit I can't. I can't seem to stop the dreams either, I have them multiple times a night.

My sister and I live on Florida and my dad died in Ohio. It took two weeks for us to get there after he passed. I never saw his body. Idk if it would be better if I had or not. But these dreams are terrible. I just want them to stop.