First up on the news, Ridley, leader of the space pirates, and self proclaimed "cunning god of death" has been KILLED! Reports are coming in today with him and his partner, Raven Beak of the Chozo, attacking little Draco and Famed bounty hunter Samus Aran. With the combined efforts of the small dragon, the bounty hunter, and that pesky Link, they killed the big purple terror. Be on the lookout for any vengeful spirits, because the space dragon's history is FULL of coming back from the dead. But in the meantime, a new threat, the mysterious Phantoon, has taken his place in the "Space Cult".

Secondly, a type of lunar event known as a "moon storm" might be occuring very soon. Our correspondents are investigating this peculiar phenomena, but there is little information on how this will affect the landscape of Hyrule. Watch out for any strange happenings at night.

Meta here with the weather, it'll be a sunny day on the great plateau, there'll be light showers in Akala, it's rather foggy near Maritta branch, the sun will be extra blistering hot over in Gerudo, so make sure to stay in the shade of Karusa Valley, and watch out for thunderstorms in the Faron region.

Now, introducing you all to a new invention of mine, the Electric Cell. When worn, it absorbs and weakens the impact of any and all electrical attacks, then when you use one of your own, it will multiply its power to the utmost degree, so any prospective storm breaker helm absorbers won't get the best of you.

https://preview.redd.it/lzc9olxd69jc1.png?width=823&format=png&auto=webp&s=8a3d40cad0db9e62d893fed5c15c1f824a5a17c4

Buy now for 20 rupees, I won't be selling this to people who will be fighting me.

Speaking of people who are fighting me, u/happy-chaos-cartel ran from a fight like the scared little coward he is. Get over here and fight me, you little rat!

That'll be today's news. Hope you all have a nice day! Except you, Observr. F⚡ck Observr. All my homies hate Observr.