You’ve probably heard that yelping when your kitten bites or scratches will teach them to stop. Whoever popularized this idea and made it some of the most common advice for handling rough play has a lot to answer for—seriously, how did this bad advice catch on? The idea is that mimicking the sound a littermate might make when hurt will signal to your kitten that they’ve gone too far. Sounds logical, I suppose. Unfortunately, it often has the opposite effect.

Here’s the deal: when you yelp, your kitten might think you’re still playing—just in a louder, more exciting way. Instead of backing off, they could get more wound up, thinking the game is getting even better. Plus, some kittens may not even understand the yelp as a sign of discomfort, since they’ve learned to play rough without consequences.

So, what should you do instead? When your kitten bites or scratches too hard, it’s game over. Calmly stop the play and redirect them to a toy, or simply give them a moment to settle down before allowing them to try again.

Don’t put them in timeout, either! Timeouts for kittens often backfire because they can unintentionally reinforce the very behavior you’re trying to stop. Picking up a kitten to place them in timeout can actually reward them with more attention, making them more likely to bite or scratch again. Instead, putting yourself in timeout by calmly walking away shows them that rough play means the fun ends, without giving them a chance to escalate the behavior.

And don’t forget to reinforce polite requests for play! If your kitten approaches you without biting or scratching, make sure to reward that behavior with attention and playtime. This positive reinforcement helps them learn that gentle behavior gets them what they want, reducing the chances of rough play in the future.

In short, skip the yelping and focus on teaching your kitten what’s appropriate through calm, consistent actions. It’ll save you both a lot of frustration in the long run!