Every time previously when I have almost cried, I would stop crying - no tears would ever fall. I didn't try to stop it, but I never managed to actually cry and it always about media like a film or whatever. But yesterday while visiting my parents and just talking about things for a while I just started breaking down and crying.

It was a little embarrassing and I'm not fully sure I understand it all yet - but it's good and bad, really. Good because I know I can cry now which is a healthy thing to be able to do and it's nice to recover from this societally forced gender stereotypes that men shouldn't cry.

But bad because... Well clearly I'm not as okay as I thought I was. Very new experience and I'm probably going to seek out a psychiatrist or something similar for a mental check-up. Anyway, didn't know who else to tell, so... thanks for reading.