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How to deal with resentment?
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Iā€™m starting to get jealous of people with normal families and never having to take care of folks their whole lives. Whenever I see couples getting lovey-dovey in public, it makes me cringe because my parents never slept in the same room since I was in middle school and would always fight. I especially get angry when people try to play saint and play high horse when they say ā€œIā€™m going to take care of my parents when they get olderā€ā€¦.

I donā€™t want to ever have kids. Nor, do I even know what I want to do in this life. I wasnā€™t even taught to be normalā€¦.. itā€™s a curse. This is apparently real loveā€¦and I feel like a horrible person because I canā€™t keep going through it. Im a shell of a person. Donā€™t even want to live. All that makes me feel content is being able to go to the gym, eat healthy, or read my Bibleā€¦.

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This. My mom and I primarily care for my grandma. I go over to her house once a week and keep her company and help her with tasks. But it is a 70 mile round trip for me every time. Caring for her is expensive for that reason.

Meanwhile, my sister lives 15 minutes away from her and although she is busy with grad school and work, her excuses not to help drive me up the wall. If she feels like she canā€™t fit grandma into her schedule, sheā€™ll make our lives a living hell if we ask her to go over there. Sheā€™ll say sheā€™s too busy with studying and then spend her weekend partying and socializing.

I have grown resentful of her because I feel like she always finds a way to get out of it and doesnā€™t realize that we all have to make sacrifices here.

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Posted
9 months ago