Holy shit!! I don’t know what came over me. We were having a phone call about something else, and suddenly I confronted her for everything. Causing my PTSD. Failing to support me and get me away from my brother after he SA’d me. I told her about all those years I felt unsafe in my own home. I confronted her for making me lie to CPS about what had happened. When she tried gaslighting me I shut her down every time. One time I yelled at her, “you fucking piece of shit. Are you fucking kidding me? How dare you invalidate me.” And hung up. I called her back later and we talked more though. I stood up for myself. I told her about all the suffering I went through over these past few years. I was crying.

I know that confronting an abuser isn’t recommended. But she did actually seem to show some understanding and remorse. Maybe because her primary role is as the enabler for my abusive brother?

She apologized several times. She also acknowledged that she had hurt me and failed. She expressed a wish that she could go back and do everything differently.

I explained to her some things about generational trauma. I also encouraged her to learn from her immense failures and keep doing better.

It was a three hour long conversation. I wonder what came over me? I kept all of that shit bottled up for years (besides therapy.) It was like a switch flipped inside of me. Whoa. I feel… strange. Powerful, maybe? And also this immense heaviness. But also… maybe somehow lighter?