I won't go into many specifics here about my past because I kind of find them irrelevant. But, because of my traumatic life from childhood to now, there have been times when a really traumatic thing has happened to me and I've thought "well, I'm glad it happened to me because I can handle it instead of someone else who couldn't". And like, my trauma therapist kind of pointed it out to me that I take on a lot of things that are really stressful. Like, I recently took over the local food bank that my friend runs inside her outreach/thrift shop/nonprofit. And it's been fucking awful at times. There have been so many times that I have said "I'm fucking done. They can figure it out themselves". But, then the next day comes and what happens? There I am again. I am not getting paid. We don't have the funds for anyone to get paid, even the founder. And today, I had to play security bc we were waiting for the cops to come for a woman who we have been helping for over a year and even had county social workers In the store steal from us. By finding a bag on the floor and just stuffing it with things. Before I was disabled, I worked in a bar and for the first year and a half, I was the bouncer. Can't tell you how many times I got swung on, had to pull people off of people, do all that shit. Like, I ain't the one yknow.

My trauma therapist said like, are these situations you're putting yourself in too much for you and I thought about it and I'm like, I don't know. I don't think so, but i also don't know my own breaking point until I get there.

Anyways, anyone else? Do you take on stress or do you avoid it?