I dont wanna go into tremendous detail but I am mixed race and my mother unfortunately was a piece of sh!t and I cannot connect with women, but esp not women who are her demographic/age... i just get this intense dissociative feeling and feel intense inside ans weird. How do you unlearn this response? Its genuinely pathetic. I dont need pity. I know this is bad. Its biased and mean to have a feelin of fear/disgust around innocent ppl who aint done anything to me. i just need real solutions.

Altho I think about it and damn. I get triggeres by lots of people. Children trigger me bc I feel like I am an adult who can hurt them. People my age trigger me bc they are my peers who bullied and rejected me. Older men remind me bad stuff. Men my fathers race trigger me. Women my mothers race trigger me. Why must I have such bad associations with the whole population. God damn. I go mute and silent aroubd everyone.

Just a vent because ughhhhhhh