I'm attractive, 34 f. after feeling stifled in a small dating market I purchased one month of premium to get started on looking for dates on a location I was travelling to in a few weeks.

first let me explain why that was a waste of time - all the guys I liked? gone. because none of them were going to waste their time swiping right on someone in "travel mode" who's KM distance is way out of range, even if they see my profile at all bc of the distance filter. when I actually arrived at the destination, none of them matched with me either. the few I matched with simply didn't have faith or interest that I'd actually meet them once I arrived (they weren't wrong, there was no momentum and the fact I knew I had messed up on swiping on travel mode had me pause all my activity on the apps).

But since I paid once, my app has been dry as fuck, even in new places I haven't been to with my current account. months later, I went to a different city of couple hundred thousand shy of million and probably swiped right on about 30 guys in the few days I was there. I did not have an active subscription.

and I matched with about 7. guess which 7? the ones that were kinda red flags, that likely have a long history of dead conversations, and I ultimately got ghosted by guys I wasn't even interested in.

these apps are a scam. I simply don't believe that out of 40 some guys, only the few ones who can't take anything serious liked an attractive, féminine, nerdy, unique, smart woman. there were at least a couple dozen decent, HIGH QUALITY, no red flag, fun looking, guys looking for fun and or something more that I liked, and I find it hard to believe none of them liked me back.

I fully believe these apps force EVERYONE to pay and they try to keep attractive people on them, hanging around like dangling carrots for people who the attractive people don't want and won't even match with. they do this by matching attractive people with the LEAST attractive people an attractive profile decides to take an open minded gamble on, so they stay on, looking for a decent match that they're more excited about.

as a woman, If the app knows someone ghosts conversations and has low sustained engagement, they'll show them to you. if they know a said user always returns to find new dates after they've met a match (and the app can tell, unless you delete it before meeting them), you will be matched with those who have a high date turnover.

they will match you with the users you said yes to but are in fact, the least into (and so is everyone else). and they will straight up withhold all likes you've received that you actually like already, that other users also like, unless they've got low engagement, to keep you swiping and to use you as their unattainable commodity.

the app prevents the most attractive, most engaged people from finding each other to use them for business IMO. they pair them with people who are less attractive so that everyone just gets ghosted. attractive people can clearly see other attractive profiles, and they'll wait for those ones ahead of actually showing up and dating people they're less attracted to... which means, staying on the apps.

while I will say that I swiped liberally and hit my limit in a way larger market than I was used to, I also swiped left a hell of a lot more than I swiped right. it knows I paid once so I'm screwed for quality unless I pay again. the only way out might be a different phone number or SM account to link.

I currently have over 1000 likes and I've ran out of profiless, so wtf is up with that? they might just all be guys who are beyond the max distance filter imposed by the app from past travel times, but, how could they see my profile and "like" me if I'm gone and ALSO out of their radius? if they viewed me while I was in distance, an I supposed to believe I never found any out of 1000 men attractive when I know I liked about 50? are none of those 50 in the 1000? seems unlikely.

in any case, if it's impossible for us to even view each others profiles, why is that number being displayed? to get money. it just doesn't add up.

these apps aren't working for anyone.