Me (34f) and my husband (37m) were broken up with today via messenger by our girlfriend (36) of several years/4 months.

So things got really hot and heavy over the summer between my husband and our girlfriend. She and I had been moving really slow because we are long distance. We only officially became girlfriends about four months ago. We had been friends/flirting/kind of dating for three years before that. Ya know, like wlw folks do... But, the last three months especially over the summer all three of us have been seeing each other every weekend for sexy times and bonding and the most wonderful weeks of my life. It was glorious!

So, she came up to visit this weekend for Labor Day. She drove over Friday night (3.5 hrs) after work as a teacher online and said that she needed to go home Sunday at 2:00. She wanted to have a good evening to rest and get her and her daughter ready to work on Monday for the garbage online teaching that we have to do. (I'm also a teacher, btw)

We ended up smoking too much weed on Saturday night and between that and the wildfires that are ravaging our state, my girlfriend woke up with a hangover. She and my husband went and got coffee and I made cinnamon rolls and scrambled eggs for breakfast when they got home. She ate, said she wanted to lay down for a little while and took a nap. At 1:45, I decided that I should probably wake her up since she said she wanted to leave Sunday at two. She said she still didn’t feel well and that she was going to sleep a little while longer. At 3:45 I thought I heard her rustling around in the room, went inside and she was sitting up getting ready to go. I helped her pack up and hugs kisses and I wish you didn’t have to leave and I’m so sorry you don’t feel well and I love you so much. I floated the idea that I could drive to her this next weekend and we could get our planning done together. Idyllic bliss.

Today, my husband who is her sugar daddy, that is their arrangement, texted her a screenshot of a shopping cart that had two iPads and Apple Pencils for me and her and a 42" TV for her room in our house, instead of a gigantic 77" TV that we have no space for which is what he wanted the first time he brought this up and we both shot him down. And she got really weird about it and was not enthused. A couple minutes after she said she wasn’t happy about it and didn't want that, she did that pissy thing and said “oh, neither of you are going to respond to me about that. Cool.“

And then proceeded to text us that she was breaking up with us. We asked for a phone call and she absolutely refused. I finally got her to say that part of the problem was the cleanliness level of our house. Granted, it’s not great, but I did warn her about this. I also told her that I was cleaning up frantically vacuuming and stuff in between lesson planning and she literally said “don’t drive yourself crazy cleaning, it's ok." And another thing was that she didn’t feel well and we “forced her out of the house where she had to drive for 3 1/2 hours and felt terrible." but remember way up at the beginning of this post where she said she needed to leave by two? To get her daughter?

I really don’t think I did anything wrong here. Somebody please tell me what is going on. I am heartbroken and losing my best friend.