Buckle up because this one’s quite a ride.

My hubby finally agreed to open up the marriage, and I began an intense 3 year affair filled with copious amounts of sex and ALL of the feels with an ex-fwb.

He was a raging alcoholic with vicious mood swings. So he’d write me epic poems and leave me messages that would make me melt in the morning - followed by mean afternoon rants after he’d been drinking.

He and I would often talk about being commitment-phobes so when he proposed to me, I was in total shock. I obviously refused and told him I needed to take a step back.

That’s when things got ugly. He didn’t appreciate the rejection so he went full scorched earth. He contacted my hubby and sent him pictures of us - clearly taken in our house. He then went on to my company’s website and sent those same pics to all the contacts listed on the site and detailed every public location we’d fucked, what my kinks were, etc. I went NC. And at my husband’s urging, I filed felony revenge porn charges against him, and my husband and I were both granted restraining orders as well.

But then it got even worse.

He kept calling and calling. Then it stopped one day. About a week later, I started getting calls from a local hospital. After the 3rd call, I finally answered because I was curious. I was informed that my former AP had gone on a several week bender and was now in full organ failure. They didn’t expect him to survive and thought it best to pull the plug. He had just turned 40 two months prior. As saddened as I was, I was also confused as to why they would be calling me about this, I was told that my AP had listed me as his medical proxy. This was his final way of pulling me back in.

I contacted his family so they could make that decision. They removed him from life support and he died a few days later.

Yes, the ending was traumatic, but there were so many beautiful moments we shared before that. So my question to you all is this: how do you remember the good times, when the break up was horrific?