Sorry long read, mostly ranting as I just can't get my head around it!

Well, my ex gf cheated. She was unsure whether it's worth fixing or not which is fair enough. However she wanted to hang out to see if it would work out. I would've been okay with this if she would not sleep with others. Seems fair right considering she cheated and broke my heart once already ?

Well, she couldn't promise it wouldn't happen again. I deiced to just go no contact now and focus on myself! Clearly means she's not loyal anymore. It sucks, 4 years down the drain! I was ready to marry her! I just don't understand why try and see how things go but still keep her options open? That's just horrible isn't it ?

Clearly she isn't in love with me anymore! It's sad but I will not lower myself to that level. She never even tried to make up for what she did! Always called me selfish but I have realised she was the selfish one! Took the cats, fucked off and took her stuff.

I was left to sort everything that was left behind. Had to move back to mums etc. Honestly it felt like she was just using me at the end, easy life, I took care of everything, paid more towards the bills etc. Just wish she'd had ended it before sleeping with someone else! Not only that, sleeping with us both! I was crying due to ill family members, very low point in my life and she just kicked me down further.