It's been 4 and a half months since me and my ex split, we where together almost 7 years and had a child (she is 6 years old now). At first I thought we would be apart to figure our stuff out so we could reconnect again down the line but over time it was made very clear she never had any intent on coming back or wanting me, tho I don't blame her I was never present for her a Or our child during the entirety of the relationship stuck in a head space I didn't realize was as bad as it was addicted to video games and in a severe depression it lead to many mistakes and nearly cheating was the final one, after the breakup tho I spent lots of time in my head figuring out myself and what I needed to do to improve and the kind of person I was vs the kind of person I want to be. My biggest hurdle is that she decide to move forward with what was my best friend before this breakup and its been killing me because I feel forced to give up the hope I was holding onto for a better future for us after time of self work it's the most painful decision iv ever had to make but I think I'm at the point where I know there is no going back to the woman I thought would be my forever and I understand my negligence led me her ( with no help from her on the communicative front) but it's very clear that she has no care for me or no look into what could be with that action, I just hope I'm in the right headspace with deciding to fully cut the ties and hope for us again.