She told me at least. A week after the fact that she cheated while I was away on a work trip. That she had gone on dates with this guy then gone out with friends and then asked me to pick her up from the station before.

But she told me, there was considerable emotional issues at the time so I thought there was some way to move forward, I didn't want to give up the life we built just yet, we bought a house, have 2 cats, built everything together. We were due to go on holiday the next day and we were both so confused so I still went. Thinking there was some way to work forwards.

We've slept in the same bed, cuddled, went out and it seemed like things were Improving and she even said as much. But then yesterday she said that she just wanted freedom, that she couldn't wonder any more if she had made the right decision or not by being with me.

I trusted this person with my life, my health, she stood by me when I had cancer and everything.

So now I'm sitting in bed. Next to another bed with her in it, part of me still hopes to make it work. We are going home at different times she's going to stay with family for a bit and then come back so we can sort everything out.

Part of me wants to try again, not keep the status quo but build a new relationship because we were magical together. But I don't think that's possible.

How do I even begin to move on. I've gotta go back and pick up our cats, Sleep in our bed, work from our kitchen. Look at all the stuff I built for her and somehow move on. All of my money is in this house I can't afford an apartment right now.

What do I do