I thought the hole in my heart was all him. The year we spent apart, sporadically going on dates, was such a roller coaster. I just wanted him back so bad. I was so so so happy when he asked me back out. And it only took 3 months to backslide and remember why we broke up. I know he’s not the one for me. I know this is the right thing for both of us. We set each other up for failure and have such vastly different values. He started to annoy me so much when he moved in with me and didn’t help with much aside from sweeping and laundry. I hated who I was with him. Insecure, untrusting, irritable. But goddammit he’s the most adorable, kind, soft, sweet little big eyed love bug I’ve ever met. I miss his stupid jokes. I miss the way he’d hold me and make little shushing noises when I’d cry. I hate feeling addicted to him all over again. I can’t wait to forget him. He’s coming tonight to finish grabbing his things and I hate how excited I feel to see him.