A year ago we moved from our old flat to the current flat, it was a great change at that time as her mood improved and she came close to me again after several months, she has mental health issues and psychosis, and I took care of her for 2.5 years, one of which was absolute hell and misery for the most part with her pulling away and shutting me out mentally and physically. But then few months before the move she became good towards me again, and it kept getting better and better progressively until we moved when it basically became like how we used to be i.e. letting each other in. Then 3 weeks after we moved, she left the country without saying a word and I haven't spoken to her since.

Tomorrow I leave this place for the flat one floor above which has the same layout but is slightly different in appearance and setup. It won't be long before I start calling it home. However I'm unexpectedly having a hard time "leaving" because the current flat is where I last experienced happy memories with her. Moving today I also got reminded of when we were moving last year and the things we did and it made me feel even more sad.

It's strange cause I did not really see this coming because the new flat is pretty much the same as the old one, I'm even taking most of my furnitures. I had even been toying with the idea of asking this girl out from the gym, and yet today I feel these emotions and wondering if I'm even ready to date if I'm feeling this way about my ex.

I honestly wish I didn't have to move. When I moved in the current place a year ago I thought I'd stick around for a few more years but landlord wanted to repossess the property for personal use so had no choice. It basically sucks to have the choice made for you and have you put in the spot to deal with it. She did that when she left, I had no say. I'm moving now, and I had no say. Kind of feel powerless when these things happen.