So, this guy and I had been messaging a couple days, essentially centered on a brat/dom relationship and all that it'd entail. At the time, I'm kind of happy but apprehensive that I may have found a dom that was work oriented, dominant in a way that I like, and cute.

We establish a safe word, boundaries, punishments and what'll learn to those punishments. We'd been messaging back and forth and it was fun, it was exciting as I was like "oh, maybe I found a food one." He lives two miles away from me so it wasn't a long distance kind of deal. However, when we start talking about meeting up, it got strange.

I told him I was at my best friend's place hanging out while she was at work. He wanted to come over. I told him no cause that's weird to me and I told him I could come to his place. He then proceeds to suggest a draft house or a park in which we could do stuff in his car? Which just made me wildly uncomfortable and I said no, as I don't do anything in public. We continue talking to me and eventually told me that he could only meet up with me during work hours. It took me THIS long to finally realize that he's hiding me (I try to think the best of people, please don't come down too hard on me) and I only could assume it was his wife/husband/partner. I asked him if he's married and if so, why did he DM me. I asked if it was an open marriage and he proceeded to tell me no and his wife doesn't know about him having a side chick and she "wouldn't take well to it." . He said "I understand if this isn't for you; tbh, I'd be upset and kind of hurt if you didn't wanna continue talking to me but I do know that's not my choice and yada yada." I blocked him immediately but... YOU'D be HURT? YOU'D BE UPSET AND HURT? Your fucking wife is at work or wherever thinking she has a husband that loves and values and cherishes her but he's out here being a fucking cheater. I'm upset and I'm hurt that I participated in doing this woman so wrong, I'm CONFIDENT she'd be devastated about this. I feel so gross and I wish I could tell her but I'm so upset with myself and having taken part in doing something like this to someone.

I wanted a dom and I thought this man was genuine and forward, as we met on a fucking dating app but I don't know anymore. I feel so fucking bad. I just don't know.