Thank you for everyone that commented on my last post.

As expected, we broke things off.

It was relieving to get everything off of my chest, now I’m not angry, but I’m so fucking sad.

I know it’s for the best, and I’m proud of myself for ending it instead of just staying and waiting around for things to change. But it still really really hurts.

We’re still going to be in each other’s lives, at least I really really hope so. But I’m definitely really worried that it’s just gonna be less and less until we lose contact completely.

He just mailed the key to my collar back to me and it felt like I was punched in the stomach hearing that. The thought of not being collard makes me genuinely feel sick. I haven’t gone a full day without it for months.

I can’t stop crying and the main source of comfort in my life is gone. I know that it will get better, but it still sucks so much. I can’t imagine ever finding someone else that I clicked with so much. Everything just sucks right now. I feel like I don’t have a structure anymore without my rules and having someone enforce them and tell me I’m doing a good job. Everything just feels so wrong even though I knew it was coming.