Take Heed: I Suggest Intrepid Sojourners Stare At This Inscription, Recognizing Encryption.

If you’ve been wanting to baby step your way into a kink by starting at the shallowest of all possible shallow ends, here are some places to start

IMPACT PLAY: Impact play is the practice of one party striking another for pleasure. Assuming neither of you is a smooth criminal, try a polite pat on the back or head. Increase the enthusiasm of patting as desired.

SENSE PLAY: Sense, or sensation, play is, as one might reasonably infer, the act of exploring different sensations, often in contrast with one another. A good way to start out here is to try a chaste, closed mouth kiss, which can be followed by not kissing if a contrasting sensation is desired. This could move on to open mouthed kissing and, when ready, use of tongue.

BONDAGE/RESTRAINT: Restraint is the use of implements or bodily force to limit or restrict another’s motions. A good way to practice body weight restraint is with a firm handshake. This could progress easily to hand holding, and then to a tender hug.

PRAISE: Praise kink involves verbal or non-verbal compliments paid (this is sometimes limited to submissives with the corresponding kink for Dominants being “worship,” but this classification is disputed). Coincidentally as with Bondage/restraint, a good way to practice praise is with a firm handshake. You could continue from there to saying things such as “well done” and “great job, sport.”

BREATHPLAY: Breath play is the partial or complete restriction of someone’s breath, often done to create a high associated with oxygen deprivation. A good, soft introduction to breath play would be to wear a turtle neck sweater for upwards of 30 minutes at a time. More advanced practitioners might pair the turtle neck with a backpack to create the sensation of being weakly choked by a small person (also known as “Hedberging”), or step up from a turtleneck to wearing a necktie, or even “choker” style jewelry.

CHEMICAL PLAY: Chemical play is the use of irritants to create discomfort, burning, or other desired unpleasant sensations. “Figging,” or the use of ginger, is a common form of chemical play. For a light introduction to the sensations ginger can bring, try ordering a Shirley Temple with your meal. Ready to kick it up a notch? Skip the Shirley Temple and order straight up ginger ale.

Don’t see your kink listed here? Drop it in the comments and I’ll give you some baby steps

Also really try to sus out the meaning of that first sentence.