Well, 2018 was hard, maybe the hardest of my life, I tried to get suicide, I lost almost all my friends, I am starting to get medicine, relapsed in self harming, discovered that my parents could be narcissist and get diagnosed with borderline disorder. Yep, the worst. I had even know my actually BFF, an amazing person sooo it's ok. My ex friends were very abusive and that's one of the reasons of my relapse. My ex bff seemed to don't give a fuck about my problems so I cut off the relationship in a very very bad way. I was in love with her for 5 years and friends for 7,so.. It was difficult. She always accused me to had replaced her with my actually bff but she was the only person who truly cares about me (and even a wonderful and funny person too ). After almost a year I decide to text her, and explain my diagnosis and tell her that she hurts me very bad (but she's not the reason of my disorder obv), but I still care about her even if I don't want her in my life anymore. I even begged her to broke up with her boyfriend bc it's abusive and violent, and she deserve better. After 20 minutes I received a text from HER BOYFRIEND (who was my BFF too before 2018). He accuse me to be an attention seeker and that he is the perfect boyfriend (well thanks God I am lesbian I replied), he said that her life is better without me. I truly don't give a fuck I wanted to talk to her but he replied that I am too useless to have a reply from her. But she replied, she was very kind despite his boyfriend and she seemed to had understood her mistakes, it was a sweet and sad goodbye. I love her but she must grow up. I begged her again to think about her relationship bc he's aggressive, a liar and cheat on her a lot of times. Then her boyfriend (which I suppose took her phone like he always did) text to me again and told me to try to get suicide again bc I don't deserve to live. I blocked him. But he contacted me on Instagram, keep reapiting I am useless, sick and "schizophrenick". I am just so hangry, how he dare? When we was friends he almost live at my home and he was like a son for my mother. I am so hangry and I can't really do anything to get revenge. I wish to put here the conversation but there are in Italian so is useless.