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Everyday I wake up and don’t want to live. I fake it till my meds kick in. Even then, it just takes the edge off. I stopped telling people I hate myself. I stopped self harming, years ago…. but the urge to cut is still there . I still have suicidal ideation, even if I have no plans.
I push people away that I love. I absolutely sabotage relationships. I cry for attention when I want it but then push them away when I don’t.
Affection repulses me sometimes . I want sexual attention but then hate when that’s all someone wants or cares about from me .
That’s it for now, I just needed to get some stuff out right now .
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- 10 months ago
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- reddit.com/r/BorderlineP...