I think the answer is just....boomer....

I've wondered for years if my parents are narcissists or just weird. Reading here makes me think maybe just boomers or maybe both.

My parents were visiting. They aren't used to apartment life as they've never lived in one. There is some noise from my neighbors in the hallways and common areas at times. Nothing awful, just people walking and having conversations. My building is nice in a nice area. However, its 90% African American and my family is white. So there is that.

So my mom becomes fixated on whether my front door is locked while we are sitting in the living room on a random Tuesday afternoon. I tell her its locked. She clearly doesn't believe me and wants me to explain how she can tell its locked by just looking at it because she is very nervous and worried (her words) that "kids will open the door and run into my apartment". I gloss over it, not wanting the discussion. Because its weird and I don't want to encourage a discussion about the probability of my neighbors randomly bursting into my apartment (low).

Later, we are headed to dinner. I walk out first and let my parents follow. My intention is to double check the door is locked behind them before we leave because the door won't close and lock unless you are sure you pull it firmly closed. And parents are the type to not close car doors or trunks and generally behave ditzy.

So I'm the hallway waiting. My mom, still obsessed with the idea I can't manage locking my own door, flips the deadbolt on her way out. So now the deadbolt part is sticking out. Like every other deadbolt, you have to lock this with the key once you are outside and the door is closed. But nope, my mom wants to help. My dad follows quickly behind her and slams the door with the deadbolt extended before I can register whats happening and stop him. He hurts his arm and damages the door frame.

Because they think I am unable or unwilling to lock my door even though I'm a grown adult living on my own for decades.

My mom "wanted to make sure I locked it".

Then my mom is upset because she was "helping" and my door is "confusing" and "complicated" so she will just let me manage it on my the rest of the visit.