Hi all,

I’ve struggled with BDD for most of my life (I’m in my early 30s) and also CPTSD.

I’m not going to pretend this is a cure all and my problems are gone, but mindfulness has been one of the greatest tools I have found.

This week I’ve been really helped by Tara Brach’s video on Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness and I will share the link to the free video in the comments, you can also get it on YouTube or Spotify.

The guidance in the later part of the video is to imagine a person or entity (it could be Buddha, or the spirit of the universe, or a good friend you feel safe with) telling you what the hurting part of you most needs to hear.

A lot of the people I first imagined were too painful, as much as I love my partner and my family, I couldn’t use them for the exercise because there’s been some kind of BDD anxiety there. I finally settled on a friend who is always incredibly supportive and I feel very safe being honest with. I imagined her saying to me “you are effortlessly good enough and worthy of being admired”, and I have been calling her back to mind this week when things get hard.

I’m having to watch back a Zoom recording of myself for work today which is hugely challenging and I’m very glad I did this meditation first, so I really wanted to share it.

Another big thing that helps me, I often don’t groom myself as well as I could, sometimes it’s a depression thing and also comes from a fear of, what if I try as hard as the other girls and I still don’t like how I look! But I’m realising how much it does for my self esteem to make sure I’m properly washed, hydrated, I’ve put a bit of jewellery on or made my hair neat. It doesn’t take away my BDD but this small act of self care does boost my self esteem and make me feel more “normal.”

What has helped you recently?