My ex is partying in San Juan on a vacation we were planning for my birthday. Idk why I keep unblocking his IG to check on him. This disorder sucks. I wanna call him and knock some sense into him, but he’s too far gone. His family is struggling with him, his friends and I (ex partner) are not talking to him, he’s spending tons of money, god knows how many people he’s hooking up with. So sad. I need to not check his IG. It’s been 2 months post discard. It upsets me to see him having fun and not remembering me.

When guys flirt with me this emotional wall Comes down when they get too close and I feel absolutely repulsed at the idea of dating them. Like when u smell rotten food and can’t eat it. Might look good from afar but ip close it’s repulsive

I hate this disorder he has. We’ll never be together again. 2.5 years down the toilet all to be forgotten about and for him to be living it up