Hiiiiii

I've had a complicated relationship with my sexuality for a very long time, but I gained some real clarity in quarantine (clearly I'm not alone!). I'm a songwriter so I wrote about my experience with my queerness and decided to release it. It comes out in a few days and now I have this awful pit in my stomach.

I love the song, I'm very proud of it, but putting it out publicly has been really hard. I've had a lot of internalized biphobia as a result, "am I gay enough?", "am I a poser?", "will queer people be offended?"

The first lyric of the song is "I think I'm just a little gay" and it follows me realizing my queerness, bit by bit, after experiencing feelings for a woman for the first time. The song is about the insecurity I felt, and still feel in my sexuality, where I fit into queer spaces, justifying the legitimacy of my queerness, etc.

Again all very real things but as soon as I posted about it I just felt...awful. I've never shared this publicly before, hence the bi panic. Anyways here's the tiktok, if you relate please let me know!