I wish you could read a person’s mind because that would help me understand why people act the way they do. There’s a woman who I was interested in. I told her and she said she didn’t like me like that. I was like cool. Things seemed fine between us. Later (weeks and weeks later), she starts acting funny with me. Only speaking to me in private, but ignoring and distancing herself from me in public and around mutuals we have. I’m getting confused because for someone who claims to be my friend this is very odd behavior. I chalked it up to the fact that I had told her I was crushing on her in the past and maybe initially she didn’t care but now randomly she feels awkward. At this point I’m trying not to feed into my delusions that maybe she does like me and now it’s difficult for her to talk to me like how things were before. Anywho, she never says anything so I end up addressing it with her and she acts like we’re good and like she’s not acting any different. She continues to behave this way. At one point SHE asks if I want to grab a bite to eat with her. I’m thinking okay cool friends go out to eat all the time whatever. She continues to act weird with me though. Avoids eye contact when we’re around other people but has all the words in the world when it’s the two of us. We go out to eat and she pays for the both of us. There’s no flirting or odd behavior. At this point I want to address her behavior again but I’m not sure where to start or what to say. Other people know I’m queer so I’m not sure if that’s why she acts “embarrassed” to be around me or if she possibly did have feelings and she’s afraid of coming across as flirting or acting queer too around these other people. Like she’s afraid of it slipping out so she avoids me completely around others. I can sit and analyze all day but at the end of the day I don’t know what to do or say.

How should I address this with her? I already tried to talk with her about it in the past and she kind of blew it off. Something about the whole situation just wreaks of insecurity, whether it’s in her own sexuality or just the validators of our friendship. Friends don’t treat each other this way.