I am not the Original Poster. Originally posted by u/ThrowAway_notfamily on r/AmItheAsshole.

Lightly edited for readability

AITA for reminding my mom’s friend she’s not actually related? (4 Jun 2023)

Throwaway account because my parents follow my main.

I’m on mobile so please excuse the formatting.

I really don’t feel like I was a jerk here but I figured I should reach out to the people of Reddit for an unbiased opinion. My (16f) mom has a friend that she’s known since before I was born (we’ll call my mom’s friend E). E & her husband, C, are friends with my parents & I just think it’s a little weird at their age to have “besties”. Like it’s perfectly fine as adults to have your own friends but my mom & E call each other “their village” & C & my dad have literally been friends since middle school & hang out all the time, they’re at our house for dinner or game night or to work on projects at least twice a week.

We also go to their house a lot, & whenever our families hang out together E & C’s daughter H (13f) also wants to hang out with me. It’s just a little irritating to have a younger kid always tagging around. If I tell her to leave me alone she usually will just go hang out with our moms but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s just in my house a lot.

So on to the situation where I may have been the A hole; I got home from school, E & H are at my house. E is at the kitchen table so she sees me come in & says hi. I’ve had a long day and I’m tired so I just ignore her & go upstairs. H is in the game room so that’s even more irritating & I just go in my room. I come down for a drink of water around dinner time & C is now over too. Everybody is just hanging around in my house & frankly it’s just a little irritating. My dad &!C come in from the deck where I guess they’re grilling, my dad asks me if I “said hi to Aunt E, Uncle C, & my cousin”. This just kind of rubbed me the wrong way because technically they’re not related, even if they have known each other my whole life. So I told E just honestly “you know you’re not actually my aunt, right?” She looked kind of surprised but she smiled & said she knew so I didn’t think anybody was upset or anything.

Then the next week was my birthday party, when I asked my mom when C, E, & H were getting there she said they weren’t coming. I expressed my surprise because I didn’t think there was any issue over me telling the truth but my mom gave me a really aggravated face & said “you can’t expect them to come over after you act like they’re not welcome all the time, right?” Then went on about how I can’t have it both ways but it’s not like that, I just don’t get why we hang out all the time it seems excessive, & a birthday is a different thing; they’ve always come to my parties. Even last year when H was not doing well they still dropped in to give me my gift. Now all our friends/family at the party keep asking where they are & it’s just stressing me out. My mom keeps asking me if I want her to call them & invite them, my dad keeps asking me to “stop pouting” but I’m really not I just don’t get why we have to act like we’re family & hang out all the time. So AITA?

Verdict: Asshole

Relevant Comments:

• OOP: I guess it’s just weird to me that they’re adults but hang out all the time even when E and my mom aren’t working on their business.
• OOP: I guess I haven’t thought enough about it to have a discussion with my parents. They do have a regular schedule of when they hang out so it’s not like I’m getting surprised but it just kind of gets old. I don’t really have many friends I’m close to whose house I can go to. I am kind of close to H but it can be hard hanging out with her because there’s an age difference and she’s a little odd sometimes because E has to homeschool her
• OOP: This comment really hit me. I never would ever dislike H because she has lupus. Before E pulled her from school I would stick up for her a lot when kids in our middle school were bullying her for how she looked. That’s not her fault, and she really is an okay person she’s just younger than me so our interests our different now that I’m in high school. She still wants to do the stuff we always used to do but it seems babyish to me but I would never ever exclude her because of her illness, she is alone enough as it is because she has to be home or in the hospital so much. I would never want her to think that it’s because of her illness that I don’t want to hang out with her. (editors note: the comment was deleted, but OOP's response had some valuable info that makes at least the gist of the comment somewhat clear)

UPDATE: AITA for reminding my mom’s friend that she’s not actually related? (5 Jun 2023)

So I read all the comments from everybody and I was pretty upset over the weekend before I realized that everyone was right and I was the asshole. I told my mom and dad that I’d like to talk to them if they would ask E, C, and H to come over.

So we all got together for dinner and it was really nice, and I told them how sorry I was for being kind of a spoiled jerk. And that I want them to feel welcome to come over, birthday or not and I was sorry I acted like they weren’t welcome for family. E just said not to worry about it, that everybody needs space and that everybody understands it’s hard to socialize sometimes. C agreed and also said to just let them know if I feel like I need space in the future and I really appreciated that. I

asked H if she would spend the night and I talked to her one-on-one and apologized especially if she thought I was excluding her for being sick. She called me dumb and said that of course she never thought that which was just really a relief. We have just been having a great time hanging out tonight, watching movies and playing video games and eating junk food like when we were younger.

I guess they are family to me like they are to my parents, and I want to say thanks to everybody who pointed out that I’m kind of a selfish person, and that adults obviously have friends too. I still like my personal space and quiet time though.

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Reminder: I am not the Original Poster. Originally posted by u/ThrowAway_notfamily on r/AmItheAsshole.