So, I’ve never actually been with a partner who wasn’t thoroughly groomed, but something about a woman’s natural body hair just drives me crazy; it turns me on more than anything else. I guess I enjoy the wildness of it and the subversion of modern beauty standards. Also, I just find it fun to run my fingers through fluffy hair and feel it tickle my nose. I want you to ride my face and smother me in your massive muff. Make me smell and lick your sweaty pit hair. Let me tease your bum fuzz with my tongue while I eat your ass. I want to get lost in your lady fur.

A bit about me: I am 37. I live in central Maryland not far from Annapolis. I’m tall, dark, and handsome-ish. Got that dad bod, but I’m reasonably healthy; I’ve lost 30 pounds in the last year and will continue to do so. Haven’t lost any hair or teeth. Lefty, vegetarian, clean and sober. Licensed professional with a bachelor’s degree. Wry, sardonic sense of humor. Introverted, but charming. Total music snob. I love small dogs. For fun, I go on long walks, binge-watch shows, see live music, attend trivia nights with friends, prepare cheese boards, cook, and listening to NPR. I’m single, never married, and child-free with the intent to stay so. I have a high sex drive and care very much about my partner’s pleasure and bringing orgasms into the world. I listen. I understand the words “no” and “stop.” I don’t balk at wearing protection. And I don’t want anyone to do anything they don’t enjoy.

I find a variety of ages, skin colors, and body types beautiful. Someone age 28-50 in reasonable-to-“curvy” shape is ideal, but I’ll leave my options open; personality and rapport are more important than anything. Shaved legs and light grooming are fine, but I’m really looking for a full bush and underarm hair. I am open to gender-queer and “het for hookups” folk. It’s okay if you drink and smoke, but I won’t be participating, and I’m not interested in being around any hard drug use.

Ideally, we would meet at least weekly for safe, discreet, and respectful FWB fun with abundant communication about our needs. Exclusive play with each other is preferred, but I will consider a nonexclusive partner as long as safety and transparency are priorities. I am open to a LTR if the romantic spark arises naturally, but I’m a hard sell; I know when it’s there and when it isn’t, and I don’t pretend. I cannot host—I share a home with people who are respectable 😉—but I am happy to travel up to an hour or so from my location, which encompasses D.C., NoVa, Baltimore, Frederick, and the Eastern Shore.

I will require we exchange proof of COVID vaccination, recent STI test results, and proof of oral or non-oral birth control if that is something you use. No negotiations on these points; health and safety are extremely important to me. I will also want to meet at least once for nonsexual interaction in a public place for a vibe check and conversation about what we want. ‘Cause, you know, we should probably like each other at least a little.

If you’ve read to the end and are still interested, start a chat and tell me your favorite music artist. SFW photos are appreciated and will be returned in kind.