So I’ve been with this girl for a year & a half. it’s been decent & rocky.. we’re both in late 20s. we are both women & part of the LGBTQ community. My girl has issues with addiction (drugs -not an issue really anymore & alcohol- still does) & has other MH (BPD, anxiety, depression, and other things) issues along with physical health.. sorry in advance if it’s all over the place! 🥺

I’m trying my hardest/best at helping & being there for my girlfriend but it’s been hard cause I have my own MH that I’m working on & other things going on in my life. I do have a disability which makes things a little harder in situations. We’re both in therapy! I tend to cry when we argue cause I feel like my girlfriend doesn’t understand/hear my feelings with how I tell her. it seems like all she does it point out all the things I do wrong & not her faults (all about her) & I can imagine she thinks that too about me. When we argue I will sometimes go into a headspace (little space) to cope or I will get quiet which gets my girlfriend annoyed to the point I have to say something or tell her I need some time.

We both have put in ROI’s to our therapist so we can talk to each others therapists. I’m hesitant on talking to hers cause I’m just anxious on what he would even say at this point cause he told my girlfriend that maybe it’s time to end things between us. My communication isn’t the greatest but I do try. She uses her suicidal ideation tendencies against me I feel like sometimes.

Is there any words or actions I can do or say to make her feel at ease or make her hopefully understand my side more? Would anyone like to be friends to be there for each other while dating a BPD partner cause that would be amazing?!?