My mother sent a very rude text to me when I asked her to stop ignoring me. This was the first time I had ever spoken up to her instead of suffering in silence. For the two days following I felt like someone held me down and kicked the shit out of me. When I woke up, I just stared at the wall and wished I hadn’t woken up. Those thoughts are familiar for me but ever since I’ve been medicated they’ve significantly lessened. But one single text from my mother triggered this 3 day long episode that I absolutely couldn’t control. I hate BPD, it makes me feel like I’ll never be a functional adult. I’m nearly 27 and can’t even leave the house some days. One seemingly small trigger sends me in to a downhill spiral that feels impossible to escape.