I like do my best to be a kind person , but it’s not to actually really help ppl (tho that is a bonus) rather but to like portray myself as a good person so that’s how people view me. It’s not for nefarious reasons, like I don’t try to gain someone’s trust just to hurt them, but I’m not really being a good person to them out of the goodness of my heart rather so I’m just viewed as a kind person. I’m not sure this is wrong or manipulative, or just a bpd way that’s being kind but since my brain got twisted it just looks different. Is this being manipulative? And if so like is it a bad thing tho since at the end of the day I am being a good person even tho that’s like not why I’m acting like a good person. I’m not gonna lie though, I’m also just “nice” like this so no one leaves me. As a teenager I have (tho I didn’t realize) gain people’s trust but then turn around and hurt them and manipulate them. I have grown from that though. Anyways yeah just sharing because I feel so manipulative even if it’s not harming ppl.