Hello, r/BPD

I feel like I am losing my mind. Like I'm incapable of being a person. I've been to the psych ward for two of the last 4 weeks and all my friends are incredibly worried about me. I think I'm having some sort of bipolar BPD episode. My therapist told me I need a "higher level of care" than what she can provide. I did an intake with an Intensive Outpatient Program, and was informed it was a "general mental health group" and would not help me at all with interpersonal conflict, and isn't really DBT based.

I feel like I have been reaching out for help in every avenue of my life, my therapist, my psychiatrist, my family, my friends, work, extracurriculars, everything. And no one is capable of giving me the kind of help I need, or so it seems.

I'm so tired of being the problem in every relationship. I'm so tired of making conflicts out of nothing and then losing people because of it. I'm so tired of being alive, and I genuinely don't know what to do to help myself feel better.