my girlfriend of 7 months is my current fp and she’s my first girlfriend which on its own is pretty stressful but her being my fp just makes it so hard.

i love her with all my heart and i’d do anything for her but since she doesn’t have bpd, the way she loves me just doesn’t feel like it compares. i’m grateful for her obviously but it can be so painful being so obsessed with one person and for them to consume your thoughts every waking moment especially when they don’t love you that intensely.

all my former fps have been crushes so when it gets to the point where im in too much pain from constantly being consumed by one person. i just try to move on and find someone else hoping the next will love me the same. but i can’t do that with my gf bc i genuinely love her and she loves me and leaving a relationship isn’t just a moving on process especially when you just want to stop the pain that isn’t their fault. i don’t want to leave her and lose the love of my life.

i just don’t know how to make her understand my bpd, understand how important she is to me and how that can be so painful.