As mentioned, I am a 32 year old male. In normal daily life, I am a stereotypical man's man complete with vet bod and a fairly impressive beard. The cliché of old country gentleman. Down to the square body truck and iconic motorcycle. While I am straight, I do have friends within the lgbtq community. They apperently call me a bear. The issue I keep having is that I'm a veteran with nerve damage. For those of me who may think I sound suspiciously like someone you know. If you don't know I have this account, now is the time to creep my page and find my rules. When you get back, you can continue. Those still with me, thank you. So, this nerve damage is thanks to spending a few months going through a martial arts course. A really really good one that I did extremely well in. However, I broke a bone, I got a plate, but the plate rides on the nerve like the bow of a violin. After years of constant pain, I now have the problem that I can not distinguish pain from pleasure. Things can now "hurt good," but unfortunately, some things that feel good are also painful. This has led me to like to explore it a little. Things like finding the right compression on my man parts. Biting that should be painful, and a kink i dont think exists yet, but id like to officially dub "fear play." Someone, please tell me what this is. Because it isn't quite cbt. Explanation in the story below.

Story below: I was dating a girl from Texas. A surprisingly road house type with a strong jaw line and a sense of fashion like twin peaks ripped off her looks. But also a dash of southern bell. And a 55-gallon drum of crazy. We were having vanilla sex one night, a cowgirl having a good ride. When she, in a more seductive way than I thought her capable of to that point, dismounts, and glides into the blow job position. This is where "fear play" comes in. I was thinking, hell yeah, this is a great night. And for a little bit it was. Then suddenly, she starts using a little teeth. It was rough, but I liked it. Then a little light ball squeezing. Nothing painful, again, it was actually quite pleasant. I was in extacy, then I heard a click like a pocket knife opening. It was weird, but I wasn't exactly worried about a little click until she went from sucking to squeezing wuth her hand. it was a good squeeze, she knew what she was doing. A hand job a little on the agressibe side, but playfully mean. It was the cold metal that made me suddenly very curious... I don't have words for how good it felt... But somewhere between the clicking noise and the cold metal currently pressed against me, I was suddenly as alert as I was turned on. And to this day, it's probably the hardest I've ever been. It was a fear boner. My dick was so hard it was physically painful. Throbbing as though a snake trying to wriggle from grasp of some larger predator. She released all but her thumb and pointer finger, clamping the bottom of my head like a vice and with the other hand slowly slid the point of the knife down my shaft slowly and playfully, tickling me and teasing me to be even harder as she explained to me in a cute gleeful yet seductive southern drawl that I had the option of coming in her mouth. Or it was going getting cut off.

So, you've read the story. I get that it includes a few things for sure, cbt, knife play, castration threats. But femdome usually doesn't have the exchange of power or the successful hunter becomes unwitting prey with yandere vibestype of dynamic. Also, typically, I'm the one who likes to go down on the woman, and blowjobs and hand jobs usually don't excite me quite as much. They're nice, and i do enjoy them, but they are boring now because of the story mentioned before. So I guess the logical question is, why am I here and what am I asking for? Well, I am guilty of being fond of women who want to make me cum. Maybe some orgasm control I do 3d print chastity cages. But unlike the overwhelming majority of that particular subgenre of kink. I'm not into any of the sissy stuff. I just find some kinds of pain extremely pleasurable. And find the rush that comes from expecting pain as a fight or flight response exhilarating. And, bonus points include; if you are physically smaller than me but are capable of folding me like laundry with or without the direct ball busting. If you know what my location means, you know its rural. So blending is the name of the game for me in public. But if you are interested in race play at all, my big thing is I can't imagine someone calling me a race trader when the girl I'm with has the rear end of a Clydesdale and a coochie like small block v8 with c cups and a breeding kink. I really begin and end with just wanting someone to bring me pleasure by learning my pain triggers.

But there's a catch. There are rules for me, be it playing or a committed relationship. Please see my rules post if you're interested.