Alright! Dominant male seeks submissive female. We'll start online and play it safely forward. We're not going to jump in head-first and make bad decisions. I'm 36-years-old, and as such, I understand that patience is a virtue, and wherever there is urgency, there is danger. So we'll take it slow.

Taking our time is the key. I want to get to know you (and you should want to get to know me) before we share a cup of coffee.

Here's a short list of what I'm looking for:

Female - I'm a heterosexual male, looking for a heterosexual female. This is just a fact of personal preferences.

Mid-20's to Early-30's - I'm ok with an age gap, but there's a need for some life experience in order to really get things to click.

Single - I have no relationship attachments and will put all of my efforts into making this work. I expect the same in return.

Children - No thank you.

Kinky and Subby - Are some aspects of your sexuality a little out of step with what's considered normal? Do you like being the one to have things done to you? Lets talk about that in detail. This is likely going to form the foundation of any relationship forged here.

Thin, Petite and/or Athletic body type - This is a hard-wired preference, and there's really nothing I can do to change it.

Good oral hygiene - My teeth are clean, well looked after, cavity and rot free. I expect the same.

Good overall hygiene - Daily bathing is important, twice-daily when sweaty. There's nothing worse than trying to perform oral sex on someone who tastes like sour milk.

Reasonably Located - Long-Distance relationships are the worst of both worlds. You have to party like you're attached, and then you have to go to bed by yourself. I won't ask this of you.

Caffeine addict - I drink a fucking-lot of coffee. You should too!

Alcohol and Cannabis - Entering an altered state of consciousness is fun and all. But of course, all things in moderation. Too much of a good thing will ruin your life, and I won't let it ruin mine.

Heavy Metal - Do you miss Lemmy? I miss Lemmy.

Artistic flair - My creativity happens in the kitchen, where does yours happen?

Travel bug - Taking a trip is an excellent test of relationship strength, and a perfect way to deepen the bond. Where have you been? Where would you like to go?

A Sense of Humour - If we can't laugh, what's the point?

If you're interested, lets talk.