You find yourself writing in code.

"I'll do the dishes," you say in your dating site profiles. It isn't that you love doing dishes, probably. You're hinting at underlying meaning. You're indicating something left unsaid. It's the implication, not the words on the surface, that you're trying to convey.

There's depth to your feelings, but you can't come right out with them. They're complex, too interconnected for the first impression of a profile, too nuanced for to come before hello. And they're too important for you to do them any injustice, especially for the sake of brevity.

You know how important presentation is. You haven't gotten to be the person you are – strong, smart, successful, self-assured – without understanding how to be presentable. You aren't out there to impress anyone, but you never fail to make an impression, and you curate your public self impressively. The iceberg of identity under your surface isn't for anybody but you and the man you're hoping to find.

So, you encode your entreaties. You say you'll take on household chores as a way of telling him you'll care for him, cater to him, make him feel welcome. You say you'll handle the cooking in order to convey your hope that he'll let you tend to him, give him satisfaction, bring him gifts of your service and love. You say you're open-minded to express your eagerness to learn from him, to follow his lead, to put your heart and mind to the tasks he sets for you.

Every sentence is an essay of devotion, an explication of your most intrinsic needs: to serve, to please, and to love. You make yourself seem fun and approachable or serious and solemn, honest and earnest or receptive and ready. Your presentation is as carefully crafted as it is characteristic of you, but it's all the same thing: a plea to be seen.

Because you know that the right man will. He's strong and smart and self-actualized in ways that fill you with admiration. He cherishes the woman you are and supports your ambitions, challenges you to be your best self and models your path to improvement in ways that fill you with inspiration. His integrity, his passion, his fair expectations, his generous forgiveness, his patience, his consistency, his love... they fill you with hope. He understands what lies behind your words. He deciphers your code. He sees you.

And, in him, you'll see your future. Getting to it won't be a quick thing, but who wants a lifetime together to move quickly? It's work. It's commitment. It's the dishes.

For him, it's everything. For you, so is he.

Tl;dr: Insightful man seeks smart, self-aware woman for realistic life-long TPE relationship. Please inquire via PM for so, so many more details.