I'm just going to be kind of direct despite the inevitable novel I end up writing. I'm looking for a submissive partner/playmate, online is perfectly fine. I am in a long term relationship with a vanilla partner and with their blessing I am here to find a kink partner. A woman who enjoys giving up some control in her life. To what degree and how absolute that happens is obviously something we'll discuss and compromise with.

Communication is essential. I don't just mean being able to have a conversation (one liners need not apply) but also to have the ability to communicate with your partner intimate details. How things make you feel, what excites you (and why), what scares you (and why), etc. You don't need to know all the answers but you need to be able and willing to have discussions about them because the mental and emotional levels of this dynamic really appeal to me. The control is arousing and intoxicating but the psychological nuances are what fascinate me and draw me in.

I'm a fan of consistent communication as well. Doesn't have to be 24/7 (though I'll expect rules to be followed at all times, naturally) but daily messages/chats will be part of it.

With all of that out of the way, who I'm looking for is a partner who enjoys a mixed dynamic. Through my few previous D/s attempts I've learned I go back and forth in 'temperature'. If you're looking for a 100% Daddy Dom to be sweet and cuddly all the time, I'm not the Dom for you. If you're looking for 100% abuse and degradation, I'm not the Dom for you. Though I'm both of those things. I'm quite creative so I'm sure you'll be pleased in both directions.

My goal is to find/develop a bond and relationship where you feel safe and free to make yourself vulnerable in your submission to me. To satisfy your inner need as much as you satisfy mine.

I'm 5'10" and 180lbs so a pretty average dad bod at the moment, I guess? Short salt pepper hair & beard and I wear glasses. I am a quiet and cerebral person in a losing war with the sun so you won't find me hiking or rock climbing but rather playing games or doing puzzles (logic puzzles are crack). Music is my biggest passion as I listen to almost anything, although I ignore/overlook a lot of western music in favor of kpop and similar. I just recently discovered Band-Maid from Japan. I am pretty progressive in my social and political views just fyi. Feminist, humanist, and misanthrope.

So now onto the kink. I want control. Without it I can guarantee I'm not interested. Your wardrobe, your orgasms, even parts of your speech (vocabulary and phrasing) I want and will earn authority over. Do you have a nightly routine? I can't wait to adjust it to my liking, to have your rituals align with my desires and preferences. As previously mentioned I am very into affection and degradation and honestly there's a perverse pleasure I get when I can successfully deliver both at once. Pet play, race play, power exchange... Basically dynamics that involve some degree of institutionalized control and possession. I have a slight clothing fetish but a strong fetish for hosiery and heels so you can expect those to be a part of your new wardrobe over time. Light bondage (not rope though), toys, and discreet play round out the list of what I'm looking for, kink wise. It goes without saying that your body will eventually be mine so every part will be used, but I'll say it anyway. This includes anal.

Limits? I don't do heavy pain, scars/marks, smoking, drugs, blood, scat, underage, ageplay, bbw, illegal. I don't risk relationships, health, or careers.

I'm looking for a woman, single or not, who feels like they're missing that piece that is so hard to describe; the comfort in not having to make a decision, the relief of having your pleasure determined for you, the guidance in becoming a better pet/slave as the days go by. A purpose beyond the life you're expected to live.

Be honest, reliable, trustworthy, intelligent (so we can have non-sex interactions as well), submissive, and healthy/fit. I'm a quiet dork and I think its great if you are too. I am very open to international partners as long as we can figure out the timing/scheduling. For that purpose I am in Southeast Asia (UTC 8).

Is this over yet? Yeah, finally. I just share all the words. If this caught your eye, share some with me.