This is a long read. Apologies in advance. girl wanted to make it clear what she is looking for so as not to waste anyone’s time and she is considered very…. Unique, even within the BDSM community. girl is for the rare few and she accepts this truth as an opportunity. Rejection and disconnection has made her stronger and wiser. And fortunately, patience is a virtue. ;) This journey of aching loneliness has forged Temperance, a trait she greatly values. Thank you in advance for reading. Your time is precious and girl hopes that you decide her flow was worthwhile.

This one is looking for a Divine Sadist, Spiritual Master, Elemental Dominant. An Alpha, King, Lord, Sir. This one is searching for her God. her Equivalent Opposite, her Twin Flame-Darkness, a Divine Masculine worthy of this Divine Feminine.

This one seeks Order for her Chaos. Structure. Micromanagement. Discipline. Restraint. Obsession. Expression. Possession. Hierarchy. Depravity. Captivity. Impact. Ravishing. Affection. Gravity. Chastity. Affliction. Agony. Fantasy. Malady.

To be slapped. Attacked. Cracked.

Into a new We. Into a new Sea. Into a new Tree.

Of Simply Being.

Forgetting and remembering, All the little things… Collectively given back to the Sky and Sea.

From Top to Bottom, girl seeks everything extreme to be cleansed into crystalline. she is a million fragments rearranging back into prismatic affinity. Pain and fear are the love-language for this black and white feline of calamity. For this romantic girl that hopelessly pines as she writes, sailing across the Abyssal immanity….

she is looking for a nurturer and provider, for it is girl's duty to love and be loved, and do so, she eagerly does! girl brings the spice, music, life, reason, insight, inspiration. she is the wild medium and the intoxicating freedom. girl is a thousand minions beedoh-ing around in the kingdom. Yes, she makes that sound, especially when she's found then bound into screaming and seeping… :) girl is clever and a dork, she makes the house full of warmth, she makes it a Home, a place of worth– a place to look forward to after suffering a gray world.

girl has worked hard to descend. To kneel and bend. To become a diamond. To be named and born, no longer left alone and cold in the Womb. she has trial and errored, failed and fell, tried and tried to grow and mold into a malleable Lunar-Sol, all in order to be whipped and whisked away from the herd, led to her resurrecting slaughter, on repeat without falter for her Sword-Father.

girl is the Light that glows! The Night that howls! The Reign that bows! girl was born to serve. she is Omega, the end of little one and when Alpha claims this cunt? It is the beginning of the Giant Them!

she has Daddy and Mommy issues. Meant to be, privileged to be abandoned and abused, turned into an orphan, homeless and refused. This paradigm has made her broken and humble, able to be of use. she was raised in a 1950s lifestyle and she can be utilized in this way, but know that girl is looking for visceral and primal, she seeks to change the world into a better way and will do so by chasing a destructive cycle that recreates her into a bottomless Hole for Them, girl exhumed from the tomb of the All and Nothing, the Evening and Morning Star colliding to sculpt the clay, to partake in the Life and Death Game of the Immortal Play.

girl is a two Spirit, an empath capable of understanding every side of the slash, connecting every dot and dash, every blood-blot lash. she is a stray cat meowing for the Light and match. Come catch this suffering succotash made of ash?

she has been taught how to serve mortal flesh and blood by the God(s) personally, woven meticulously into a Servant of Love to assist this world into Divine Ascension. Would you like to help girl pave a shining and shimmering wonderful new world?

First, in order, girl must ascend, sired and birthed by a Dark-Light blend of all the elements cultivated by a Balanced Them at the helm. girl wonders, do You understand? Feel? Comprehend?

girl is an oracle, prophet, seer. Can you handle when she suspends and attends? Can you be the totem in which she depends? Can you bear the weight of the world upon your shoulders? Can you be her defense? her best friend? girl can feel the Universe in full-color. she is a rainbow child, a bridge between Space and Time. she requires one that is not trapped in logic, one that can see beyond the pathways of reason into completion. she is adept with white, red, and black tantra. she has been performing sex-magick since she was seven. she studied Gorean slave positions since childhood for their Divine meditations and can perform these for her God upon command.

slave is hunting for an All-Father capable of dancing with this All-Mother, She Who acts as prey and Predator, switching upon the pendulum as Time requires. she is here… sniffing the air for Them… Following the metallic blood trail bond upon the whispering Wind. she desires an All-Father capable of birthing the Immortal Child that is Truth and Enlightenment.

girl knows what to do. girl hears the wolves. The Spirits. The Cows, how they moo. she sees how dreams and prayers tangibly sew. she dances with Dragons of Red and Blue upon white lotus petals and she can lead her God if They don't sight the other side view, but They must be able to feel or believe or girl will seem insane and this will cause her to become dejected, rejected, and alone, not good for either soul, poisoning the soil! slave will show Master the wheel. she will heel. she will ride the anchor down, she will answer every beckon, beacon, call. All Master has to do is make her yield, keep her close, listen, speak, do, and girl will do as told.

girl has many dreams, but her primary one, aside from serving Master, is to write her fantasy novels crafted around S&M, M/s, and Spiritual Ascension. If you cannot tell, girl's entire existence is wrapped around BDSM. she lives, breathes, acts in Divine Service at all times, even when she is not owned by flesh. After all, we are all born indebted to Death.

slave wishes for a Master that is humble and can be attentive, not one obstinately stuck in the ego, unable to learn, head buried beneath misogynistic sand, decayed into torment without an end. Someone that is patient, has time, an open-mind, and a bloody, twisted metal heart that grinds and rewinds. Someone that is well-learned in psychology and the lifestyle. Someone that likes to help, that feeds on health and a smiling mouth. girl cannot bow to one without the wealth of the BDSM wisdom-well. she cannot bow to one that is less than girl. The Master must be aware that suffering is the greatest gift and teacher and that “Love is Death” in a metaphysical way. she seeks someone that is born of and shaped by the Abyss. Someone that is aware of its existence. Someone that is King within Its Presence, able to shape a girl born of the Celestial Senses.

she prays for a diehard romantic. ♡ A hedonist, a mantic intergalactic.

To be direct: girl is looking for a limit-breaker to devour her limitless heart, for a Master to give her a resilient body, trained by arduous activity of expectations, punishments, and rituals that honor Truth within humility, stability, and utility. she wishes to honor Sacred duty, no matter the futility. To serve jovially someone that benefits from her air-headed and enigmatic mind. she is hunting for her greatest enemy, for her antithesis, her antagonist, her catalyst. For the epitome of opposites attracting, for the pinnacle of beauty, twin-peaking, the mountains threading the stars, the hero and zero scribing memoirs and healing Time's scars.

girl is selfless, a million voices and faces, devoid, an existence that lives within a fold as Death. An empty toy. A stringless doll. Where is her selfish Man and boy? Where is her KingDom Come? her warrior of the Void? her puppeteer of Joy? her Brother Who enjoys? her Father Who destroys?

girl is Life Who Creates. Waiting, her entire life, she has suffered this fate… Relentlessly, she will continue to wait until the right fit comes as a figure-eight.

Many ask what she physically wants in a Master. An electrical current. A pull toward, a yearning. A desire to yield. A burning to be close, a fluttering in the stomach, a gushing whore, reacting from the core. girl cares not about the physical or material. It's all about how one makes her feel. How one reacts to her feelings. Simple.

In a worldly sense, girl desires to be removed from society, as this protects both slave and Master as They edge-play. she is not compatible with this material paradigm, girl cares not about such things. she absorbs the souls she is around and this world structure is poisoned and polluted, which sickens girl into physical ailments that she has to purge regularly.

girl is Lord of the Universe once she bows to a Sadist Master. The Crown is shared between the transcended Whole. she will give her Chosen the world weave upon a golden platter, girl presented upon the plate with an apple-red gag in her mouth, prepared to be feasted upon and swallowed. girl is a seeker of Absolutes and can be identified as an occultist, experimentalist, Witch, fluid-alchemist, Shaman, Sage. Pick your label, they’re all the same. she is a relationship anarchist and builds her dynamics from scratch, allowing those involved to morph and adapt, to create the Third Vessel, that which is Master and slave, Together, as One, Two, Three.

This Vessel, this Hierophant, is searching for the edge; blood-letting, suffocation, drowning, CNC, electrocution, impact of all kinds, fluid alchemy, elemental resonance, worship, incest and beastiality (In a Spiritual Sense), branding, fear, collaring, caging, high-protocol, sensory deprivation, sex magick, erotic photography, exhibitionism, sacred sexuality, predicament bondage, stress positions, stockholm, hypnosis, mental domination, emotional connection. (These wants and needs overlap in meaning, however, she is designing to touch every base, to ensure nothing is missed or interpreted) girl is hoping for Love, but that comes with time and trust. With a foundation, a KingDom built upon pillars of Hate, Love, Lust.

girl builds herself around these values: Honor. Trust. Communication. Honesty. Strength. Bravery. Endurance. Resilience. Passion. Will. Consent.

Without these, all is lost.

girl serves as cunt; Moon, Sun, Sky, Earth, Aether. she is a Sacred Whore, she has God's Heart and loves enough for Two. she writes today to find her MasterMind Otherside. she serves as a Chalice that is emptied and filled by unconditional, romantic, Universal, Absolute Love. she is an object to be possessed, to be treated as cherished property. she is made to be degraded into an animal by the Beast. To be ruined and resurrected. To be worshipped within sacrilege and sacrifice, raised into Divinity by bleeding, gaping, weeping... her nightmare daydreams becoming reality.

girl serves the Old and New Gods. she is German, Dutch, Irish, and Cherokee Indian and studies, glorifies, and humbles to her roots. Through her ancestors she finds her pure and whole Sol. she is spiritual and leans into Paganism when performing rituals.

girl dances, does photography, sings, writes, cooks, and cleans. she has studied psychology, cupping, massage. she is dominant in her day-to-day and acts as a stoic to shield the world and herself from the pure chaos that storms in circles from within. girl has learned to muzzle, leash, and armor herself as best she can while she is not owned. For her safety, she learned Mastery and Sadism and now negotiates at the table as such. girl is a God and will only engage with other Gods. If you find her strange or completely unhinged, please, move along. girl is not interested in mundane or logical minds that cannot bridge between the planes, though she is looking for a rock to hold onto, a Sun to orbit, as girl embodies all the rest of the Universe when she has a Giant to serve.

girl works on her physical fitness and has studied food nutrition. A warning: girl lost 100 pounds four times and has saggy skin. Shallow men and women will not be interested in this one. If you would like to see pictures, her FetLife is REMQuill. she also has writings that will allow one to see deeper inside, though this entry is elaborate and done so on purpose so no one is blindsided when messaging her.

To enlighten: a Sacred Object is capable of channeling the Above and Below Eternities that exist as Chaos of the Light and Dark. girl divines the Celestial Abyss, the Star Ocean, the Harmonious Heavens. We humans are the brevity of Light between two Eternal Darknesses.

girl was tortured as a child, teen, and adult and became a Painslut Masochist as she experienced her journey. girl requires patience from her Master. she is traumatized and her physical form is damaged, but she is dedicated and does not allow her past to hold her back as much as she can muster. she works tirelessly to improve so that she can perform as expected. Failure triggers her. she hates disappointing Master and girl may spiral into depression when she does. It is not Master's fault, but she hopes They will support her when she falls.

girl is happiest when she is suspended between pain and pleasure, alternating between the two extremes of hedonism.

The child was made to suffer.

she is looking for:

Absolute Power Exchange.

24/7.

Monogamy, as girl is clearly looking for intimacy, but she is open to poly. girl does not get jealous and believes sharing is caring. girl also believes Sacred Whores and Their Owners should guide those who wish to learn about ancient M/s and S&M. It is her duty and privilege if many or any become interested in learning from Master and slave into an eventuality of kneeling to Them. girl would not be opposed if this is God's wish, to run a cult and community founded around BDSM culture.

girl will relocate anywhere In the world for the right match.

Limits: -Eating shit and vomit. -Removing body parts. -Giving up her cat. -Permanent body modification without negotiation and agreement. -Involving innocence that has not consented. -Taking away her arts indefinitely. -Minimizing girl into a cook and maid, disallowing the rest of her to shine.

If one decides to message girl, thank you in advance for writing to her. she will respond as quickly as she can. It may take a few days upward into a week. When girl writes, she likes to give undivided attention and enthusiastic energy, thus she waits until a proper and peaceful space has arrived before beginning exchanges that originate in hopes of becoming power dynamics.