Hello there,

Thank you for reading my post. I'll try to keep it somewhat concise and to the point, but we both know that's a hard thing to do when trying to describe a complex want. So bear with me... Just to be sure you didn't merely skim it though, I'd like you to use the word 'subterfuge' in your reply should you decide to write one.

So, I'm looking for somebody to fall for. Not right away, not even anytime soon, but hopefully eventually. I'm looking for the type of connection that grows naturally. For this, I would prefer to have somebody close by, as I find physically spending time together very important. As you may have spotted in the title, I am from the Netherlands, you eagle-eyed reader you. I enjoy getting to know somebody by having a good time, laughing together, cracking some jokes, and seeing if our personalities and humor styles match. To every (real) personality, there's a physical entity attached though, so let's get that out of the way too. I am tall (1.80m/5'11) and quite heavy (many kgs/even more lbs). I am not a tiny person, and I prefer you not to be one either. A superficial preference, but a preference nonetheless. Let me ramble some more though.

I am submissive. While I don't see myself ever doing something TPE style, I also don't want to constrain my submissive feelings purely to the bedroom. I see it as a part of my personality and maybe even love language. It's how I feel comfortable and myself. Preferably, you'd recognize this sentiment with your dominant side. It's difficult to concretely put into words how this would be expressed, since every pairing results in a different dynamic. To have a dynamic as one of the fundamental building blocks of a relationship comes with certain necessities. For instance, the necessity to communicate properly. One half of communicating properly is to actually discuss things openly, and the other half is to actively create an environment in which things are comfortably and openly discussed. Another is to know and respect one another's boundaries. Aspects like these have to be worked on together. They're a team effort. Actually, this is obviously not inherently tied to a dynamic within a relationship, but with the emotional intensity (and therefore vulnerability) I have in mind of such a connection, they're worth explicitly mentioning.

In terms of dominance, I enjoy when somebody can make me feel submissive without having to 'force' it on me. When someone is calm, cool, and collected. When your confidence and experience results in me already slipping into a submissive mental state. Maybe I'd even look up to you. Outwit me, outsmart me, make me feel things because you want me to feel them. Make me feel safe, so that I can be vulnerable and real. Share your own feelings with me. Don't be afraid to show your imperfections, so I don't feel as bad about mine. Hurt me because you see it as an act of affection, rather than an act of punishment. I'll take it, because I speak that language too. I don't want 'funishments'. I want pain because we both enjoy it, and we don't have to hide it behind a curtain of 'punishment'. I don't want to play an act. You often hear that submission is a gift, but I think that's fairly limiting. My submission is a result of feeling safe and romantically attracted to somebody.

A few paragraphs later and just like I thought, there's plenty left unsaid. Nonetheless, I'll stop writing here. I suppose we'll have to have the conversations to actually figure out whether we are compatible in our views. I'm curious about you now. What are you looking for? Was there something in here that you liked? Can you make me laugh, and I you? I'm curious to hear your thoughts.

At last we reach the end of my post. To close off in style, I am happy to unravel my greatest ruse yet. I don't actually want you to mention 'subterfuge' in your response. It was just some light trickery to employ a thin filter for my inbox. Instead, please use 'chicanery'. Its one of the words I came across when looking for the proper one to use for my earlier misdirection. Isn't it pretty?

Talk to you soon. Maybe.